I was so excited about National Doughnut Day that I set my alarm clock for 3:30 am. I wanted to get up and at ‘em. Ok, not really. I did set my alarm clock for 3:30 but it was because I had to take Lola to the airport. She was heading down to Florida for a writer’s workshop where she would be for the next week. This was a god-awful time to be awake and moving, but I was happy to get the extra time with Lola in the car and to see her off. Her flight was at 6:30 which meant we had to be at the airport by 5 am the latest. We made it in time. Nothing out of the ordinary happened in our travels and traffic was light at the airport too (we thought it might be busy on a Sunday). I pulled up to the curb, heaved Lola’s 60-pound suitcase out of the trunk, gave her a kiss and a hug goodbye, wished her luck, and then I was back in the exit lane from the airport. Lola waved as I drove away, a giant smile on her face and that was that. Now I was a bachelor with a whole day in front of me to celebrate National Doughnut Day.

My biggest problem was that it was still early. It was Daylight Savings Day and even though the extra hour of sleep was much appreciated, it didn’t change the fact that there wasn’t much open at 5 am on a Sunday morning. Not even Dunkin Donuts opens that early (excepting the 24-hour spots). As I drove down Route 24, I started to think about all the places I could get doughnuts. I thought about the specialty doughnut shops in Providence like PVDonuts and Knead Doughnuts, even Allie’s Donuts in North Kingston. All of them would have been at least a half hour out of the way and I was unfamiliar with their hours. I’d hate to go all the way there only to find out they don’t open until 7 am (perfectly normal for a bakery) and have to wait around until they opened. There was always Ma’s Donuts which is open 24-hours, but they are on the other end of the island. The closer I got to home, the lazier I was getting (a reflection of my increasing tiredness).  I remembered that there was a spot in Tiverton (close to the Fall River border) that was only an exit or two away from home. It was a place called Sip n’ Dip Donuts.

Sip n’ Dip is a small local chain in the area with eight locations. They’ve been around since 1985 and while they seem like a spot that might be iconic, I don’t hear much chatter about them. I’m not even sure if Lola would be aware of their existence. That doesn’t mean they’re not famous, it just means they are not a Rhode Island institution like Del’s or Newport Creamery. I went to their location in East Providence on National Coffee Day last year and the coffee was fine. I think I had a doughnut there too and it was good as well. I have seen the spot in Tiverton over the years and always wanted to check them out. Now, at 6 am on a Sunday morning, it seemed as good of a time as any.

When I pulled in, I wasn’t sure they were open but as I drove around the drive thru lane, I could see someone inside. Then I saw their hours posted and confirmed that they were indeed open for business. I had never realized it before, but it is actually just a drive thru shack. Small enough for a few employees inside but not a place where you would walk into and sit down. The best I could tell there was only one person working inside and she was still setting things up for the day. I pulled up to the window and was greeted by some kind of old lady nicety like “hun” or “sweetie”, I ordered one of my favorite doughnuts, the glazed cruller, and then waited in anticipation. After some scruffling in the back the lady came back with the bad news: they hadn’t delivered any crullers today. In a fit of anger, I reached up and grabbed her through the window. No. No I didn’t. But my heart was broken. In my dejected state, I glanced at the list of other doughnuts and settled for a honey dipped doughnut. That’s kind of like asking the most popular girl in school to the prom and ending up going with your cousin. I took my doughnut and went home. When I walked inside, I immediately crawled back in bed and then fell asleep for another hour or so. When I woke up, I made a cup of coffee and then sat down to enjoy my doughnut.

I love a good doughnut. This was an ok doughnut. I don’t think it is Sip N’ Dip’s fault, I just think that as a doughnut, a honey dipped is no cruller. It even fails by comparison to the glazed doughnut. A glazed doughnut, like a Krispy Kreme, has a sweet crust of glaze on the outside bringing in sweetness to every bite. This one didn’t have enough of that sweetness. It was light and airy, which is good, but more starchy or yeasty in taste. It just wasn’t the doughnut of my dreams. Had they delivered crullers on this fateful day, this story would have a more happy ending. But the honey dipped was a mere taste of doughnut that could be something better. I’ll still happily go back to Sip N’ Dip, I just won’t be catfished by the allure of a fancy-named honey dipped doughnut.

For a guy home alone, it wasn’t that raucous of a Doughnut Day celebration. That’s ok though. I needed a day to recover from my early rising. In any case, if I was going to go overboard with a celebration, I would have preferred Lola to be there. Maybe next time. I had a Lola-less week ahead of me, so I was planning on keeping things pretty tame in these parts. Lola, on the other hand, was off on an adventure in the company of some supportive friends. It’s going to be a long week. I’m going to need more doughnuts if I’m going to make it through this.

Next up: National Nachos Day